Am I Going Mad or Am I Just a Mommy?

Another Reason to Love Jerry O'Connell

As you all know, I have just crawled out from under a rock.   For the benefit of those like me, I thought I'd share Jerry O'Connell's spoof of Tom Cruise's Scientology indoctrination video.
(What a whack-job poor Tom has become!   I say good for Nicole for getting out of there, and is someone organizing a rescue mission for poor misguided Katie and darling little Suri?)

Okay, now that psycho Tom has given you reason to have nightmares for months, here's Jerry!  I think I now have to make room for him on my special list, along with Harrison and George, Johnny, Orlando, Viggo...

Through the Eyes of a Preschooler

My three year old son came home from school proudly waving this masterpiece in the air for me to see.   My first reaction was "Damn!  The boy's a prodigy!"  Then I promptly realized that he could not have drawn this himself, especially since we've just mastered the happy face.  The honor goes to one of his teachers, Miss Ashley.  RJ told her what to draw.

So, what have we here? 

Well, the green on the right is a maze, decorated with giant flowers.  This is not unlike the giant maze we puzzled our way through during our trip over the weekend.  In the middle is a road on which only big trucks and trains travel.  I was especially curious about the cheerful lady on the left...

Moodswinging Mommy: Who is this lady, sweetie?

RJ:  She has nice hair.

MSM:  She does!  Who is she? (I fully expected him to say a witch, given the hat and the broom-like structure in her hand.)

RJ:  She's the cleaning lady. (Ah, so it could be a broom or a feather duster.)

MSM:  The cleaning lady? I like her hair and her pretty dress.  What's the cleaning lady's name?

RJ:  Mommy.

Sigh.  At least I have nice hair.

But what's with that hat and those stove pipe ankles?

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In other news, Jen at Absolutely Bananas is hosting a giveaway.  The prize?  A copy of Haiku Mama, by Kari Anne Roy.  Click on over and leave a comment for your chance to win.  Submit a haiku of your own and Jen will enter your name more than once.

I never pass up the chance to indulge in a little Haiku.  Notice the continuing theme?

                               
                                            Dust bunnies scatter

                                           I am so tired of cleaning.

                                            Make Swiffer onesies!

"Who's that sad little thing?" they asked...

Who is that pathetic creature in this week's Wordless Wednesday?  Why, it's me, of course!  (Annie wins a virtual Swiss chocolate bar for being the first one to guess correctly.)  Yes, I know I look like a boy.  For some reason, my mother insisted on cutting my hair short. 

What?  It was my first day of Kindergarten and as you can see, I was not very happy about going to school.  I don't remember the details, but I'm reasonably sure my parents were laughing at me when my father snapped this gem.  Like my uniform?  I will not wear green by choice to this day.   My parents sent me to a small private school because I could start school a year earlier than I could in public school.  Their reasoning was that they felt I was gifted.  (Yeah right!  Like they could fool anyone with that line?  They just wanted to get me out of the house.)   Weird bit of trivia: Since there was no bus route to my house, I went to school in a taxi for the first year.  How cool is that?

When?  Sometime in September, 1976, approximately 7:50 am. 

Where? This photo was taken in our gorgeous family room complete with wood paneling on the walls and the bright red shag carpet on the floor.  The picture does not capture the shagginess in its full glory.

How? Well, I suppose I stuck my lower lip out and tried to look mournful.  Kind of like this:

 

Can you see the resemblance?

(LOL,  Just testing new web cam and thinking about all the chores I have to do.  I'm not having a good hair day.  Using a brush might be a start.)

I'm proud to say that my son has now perfected "the look" himself.  I'd show you a picture, but that's now against my blog rules.  Luckily, the Pee Monster has also inherited my talent.  Check him out and you'll see what I mean.  Like mom, like cat:

Stay tuned for more trips down memory lane and oodles of web cam fun coming soon!

 

Wordless Wednesday

More Wordless Wednesday participants

Need A Laugh?

If this is you, head on over to This Eclectic Life and read some of the hilarious entries in the (Thank you funny lady Jenny for pointing me in that direction.  Your entries are great!) I've discovered some real gems to add to my (as yet unpublished) blogroll. In a display of uncharacteristic moxie, this baby blogger entered 3 posts of my own.  This is indeed a bold step for me, since I've never submitted my writing for a contest before. (I'm assuming college applications don't count.) Here are my entries for your consideration.  They made SuperDad laugh,  although he does have several ulterior motives, now that I think of it.  Anyhoo, here they are...

• I Know I'm Not Alone

• How Strong Are Your Nerves? in case you can't be bothered to scroll down a day

• Public Service Announcement

 

  

Answering Machine Love

Good morning, readers! Things have been a bit rocky for the past couple of days here at Six Flags.  Moodswingingmommy is dealing with two sick children.  That means no preschool this week, and the cash is free-flowing out the door in the form of medical co-payments.

Since I'm not feeling all that creative, I think I'll continue with my telephone theme from my last post.  'Cause that horse ain't dead yet. (And whoa, 23 comments?!  Thank you for making me feel like Queen of the Blogosphere.)

Upon reflection, I realize that I  have other more personal reasons for screening my telephone calls.

First, we live on the same street as a pediatrician with the same name as SuperDad.  We get many calls for Dr. Same Name.   When I'm in a good mood and otherwise unoccupied, I answer and pleasantly inform people that they have the wrong number.  Sometimes I even call them back because a sick child is a priority.  I don't mind the inconvenience.  However, every so often, the person on the other end is less than polite.  I don't expect any of them are reading my blog, but this message is for them: I understand that you are stressed because your child is feeling ill, but there’s no need to get snippy with me! It’s not my fault that you have the wrong number. And no, unless I’m employed by the phone company or Dr. Same Name, I’m under no obligation to look up the correct number for you.  I was nice enough to call you back and tell you that you’d dialed the wrong number because I didn’t want your sick child to suffer. So don’t be a jerk! (I feel much better now, thank you!)

Second, sometimes the messages left on our answering machine are a source of great amusement to me.  I'm sure my mother-in-law and grandmothers everywhere would agree with me on this point, as there are "I wuv you, grandma!" messages saved on machines all over the world.   It is not surprising that I enjoy listening to my messages when I consider that  my most exciting entertainment opportunities involve going to the Tot Lot and watching whatever is on TiVo.  Some recent highlights:

• the local Baptist Church calling for SuperDad (who is Jewish, in case you'd missed it), inviting him to Easter Sunday Services

• the Republican National Committee calling to solicit funds  from SuperDad (who is not a Republican last time I checked)

(Okay, which one of you is playing a joke on SuperDad?  Seriously.)

• My all-time favorite has to be the series of messages left in response to my seductive voice:

Heyyyy Jimbo!  It’s me.  Who’s that on your answering machine?  You got yerself a lady friend you aren’t tellin’ me about?  Gimmee a call, you lucky dog!

And then 3 days later,

Heyyy Jimbo!  It’s me again.  How come you haven’t called me back yet?  Oh, yer probably too busy with yer lady friend and don’t wanna share her with me.  Gimmee a call.  We’ll, uh,  go get some eggs or somethin’.  Or maybe your lady friend could cook for us.  Gimmee a call, buddy!

Sadly, this man never left his number.  Pity, really, because he was so charming I may have been tempted to call him back.  Who knows, he may have wooed me away from SuperDad. I like to think that he eventually found Jimbo's correct number and they did have those eggs. 

And that, dear readers, is why I love my answering machine. I'm sure everyone has a favorite answering machine story. I'd love to hear yours!

 

No Autographs, Please!

I'd like to give a big thanks to Bitter Tonic (a really funny lady, by the way) for pointing me in the direction of this fun activity, courtesy of MyHeritage.com My parents always said I had star quality! Now if I could only figure out who some of these ladies are, I'd be all set.

Strange, I've gotten Winona Ryder a lot, but she didn't even come up here. That's fine by me, given her more recent trouble with the law. You don't have to hide your valuables with me around, I swear! Who do you look like?

Sunday Smile

I had to include this because this is pretty much how I feel a good portion of the time. I'm sure many other stay-at-home mommies could say the same! Yes, this is our RJ. Yes, instead of wading in and rescuing my son, I chose to take a picture. I know, bad Mommy! Before I get chastised by all and sundry, I want to reassure everyone in cyberspace that he was promptly extricated by the boy on the left.

Sunday Smile

If you are in a bad mood because the weekend is almost over, watch this! What a great way to start the week! Eldest child requests to see it daily.