9,000 and Counting

Dear Readers-

Moodswinging Mommy here. Since my to-do list and life are positively insane right now, I am bringing you one of my favorite posts from the past year.  I felt obliged to mention this because I don't want you reading and exclaiming "What?  That crazy lady has gone and had another baby?  God help the Human Race!"  Nope.  The baby to whom I am referring below is now two and a half years old.  I might add that the routine hasn't really changed much.  Nowadays, it is more likely that I am stepping on microscopic pieces of Lego rather than Thomas engines.  Sadly, there are still diapers.  Alas, there are no baby swings big enough to restrain entertain my toddler.  Instead, we rely on Sharpies and Magic Erasers, respectively.  My daughter is an artiste and the walls are her canvas. 

Enjoy! 

9,000 and counting?  What is the significance of this title, you may ask?

Ooh, I feel like I'm playing Jeopardy!

Answer= According to the lovable geeks at the Mad Sci Network, this number represents the average number of neurons (those are brain cells to you and me) a healthy person loses daily from age 30. Upon first glance, this may seem like a very high number. However, lest anyone get worked up in a tizzy, you should know that this loss represents a mere 5 % of the total number of neurons you have in your noggin. Phew!! Don't forget, though, that we're talking about a healthy person. Alcohol increases brain cell death, and use of some drugs kills off neurons at much higher rates. All those martinis and gin & tonics in graduate school don't seem like such a good idea now, do they?

Makes you wonder about the dreaded Mommy Brain, doesn't it? Now, I've heard the research and haven't yet read the book, but from where I'm sitting, it doesn't feel like I'm smarter than before I had children! I'm still waiting for that perk to kick in. Maybe it will happen after my hair stops falling out in clumps?

Since I'm playing scientist, here's my Hypothesis, based on my own personal experience, of course: Being a Stay-at-Home mom increases brain cell death at a rate of 9,000¹⁰*.

We are a sleep-deprived, forgetful, and clumsy lot! If one is looking for the milk in the house of a stay-at-home mom, you'll most likely find it in the cupboard. The cereal, why it's in the fridge, of course! How many times have you found yourself somewhere, only to forget why you went there in the first place? The simplest of tasks seem to take forever when interrupted by the countless whims of mini dictators. For example, I am still writing baby-gift thank you notes and am starting to wonder if I will ever finish. My typical routine goes like this:

1. Lay out thank you cards, gift list and envelopes on dining room table.
2. Fill sippy cup for RJ.
3. Start writing. Darn pen doesn't work!
4. RJ calling. Turn Thomas on the TV in the living room.
5. Go in kitchen. Why am I in the kitchen? Ah yes, a pen!
6. Return to dining room. Write 2 thank you notes.
7. Being paged again. We hate Thomas today. Switch channel to Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.
8. Address and stamp 1 envelope.
9. TV is too loud. Go and turn it down.
10. Oops, can't find address for envelope # 2.
11. Take envelope to basement to look up address on Internet....No pen down here.
12. Hear through monitor that Baby C has awakened from nap.
13. Run up two flights of stairs. Change diaper. Feed baby. Put her in swing.
14. Return to address envelope in basement. Oh, that's right, no pen here.
15. Go upstairs to get pen.
16. Baby crying. Binkify her.
17. Down to basement again, address envelope in 5 seconds flat.
18. Hear loud thud and screams from overhead.
19. Run upstairs. RJ has dropped die-cast Thomas train on his toe. Kiss it better.
20. Go to put stamp on second envelope. Oops, forgot it in basement.
21. Run down. Retrieve envelope. Put on stamp. Phone rings.
22. Answer phone. No, not interested, thanks. Harvard should be donating to me.
23. Where's 1st stamped thank-you card? Find RJ playing with it. Confiscate it.
24. Put 2 thank-you cards in mailbox for pickup.

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! (Estimated time to complete: 7 min.; Actual time: 40 min.)

As if this weren't enough, once I read (and finished) things like this. Sometimes I actually understood them, too!

Now I read these:

 

I don't mean to knock my current reading choices. I love good deals as much as I love the idea of doing things the easy way. I'm all about easy! My point is this:

If I continue along this path, will there be a time when Real Simple will not be simple enough for my brain to handle?

I think I'd better go and do a Sudoku.

Scratch that. The baby's crying.....

Comments

[Maddy]

Ooo dear I keep getting a message from typepad that I've never seen before which keeps popping up and now I've forgotten what I was going to comment!

[moodswingingmommy]

You are a goof, Maddy!

[Shelley]

Oh boy, your days sound like mine!!

[Jonathan Menon]

"this loss represents a mere 5 % of the total number of neurons you have in your noggin."

Does that mean that we are supposed to become vegetables 20 days after our 30th birthday?

Somehow the numbers don't quite add up.

[Puzzles Sudoku]

Love number 22 :)